TITLE: Chargin' Mah Lazar!!
PAIRING: Gen (House Wilson Friends FOREVER)
RATING: PG
WARNING: You may want to take a look at the popular internet meme "Shoop Da Woop" before reading this.
SUMMARY: This is what happens when I throw virtual darts at my to do list and say "Write something... Right NOW!". *Thack*
"AHM CHARGIN MAH LAZAAARR!!" the black head shouts, and then spurts blue flames all over the screen. Blood spurts from the haples victim it had been staring at, and as the flames subside, nothing is left but white. The viewer in the comfortable black office chair laughs, then hits "replay". The gruesome scene plays again, and House moves on to another link.
*FOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH*
Another scene plays out similarly, except that this time a piece of fruit was attacking. How awesome would it be to go "AHM CHARGIN MAH LAZAAR!" and then proceed to blow whatever you aimed at to smithereens?
House chuckles at the idea, and goes to find Wilson. Wilson is eating beans. Wilson is also working, because that is what he is paid to show up at the hospital to do. House is distracting him, and it's very irritating.
"...and then it goes 'AHM CHARGIN MAH LAZAAR!!' and the guy just gets blown away." House is saying. But suddenly, Wilson's mouth erupts with blue flames which House only barely manages to duck away from. Knocked back by the force of the blast, Wilson falls over on the floor, slightly dazed.
House crawls over. "What the hack was that?" he yells, and Wilson just glares. House takes a quick glance at the smoldering hole in the wall between Wilson's office and the conference room. He carefully relocates himself three feet in the other direction.
Wilson sat up. "Where did the blue fire come from?" House shrugs. "It looked like a Shoop. As in 'Shoop Da Woop'," he adds to Wilson's confused expression. "Where something goes "AHM CHARGIN"- wahh!" House ducks to avoid another blast.
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Theoretically, there would need to be some kind of cleaning mode that one could put it in to wipe off the screen. And because most likely this would be a portable solution, it would need to have shock mounted hard drives and the like. For gamers, there might be an accessory doxk one could mount it on to make it into a screen, but attach mouse/keyboard to. This may also have a projector in it for business meetings, and various kinds of memory input.
Cons would be that this device may bend, and that it's screen may collect scratches and dirt on it. It would be awkward for new users, because so many people are used to keyboarding. A stand may be necessary for those that want to set it up on a desk, and many would become frustrated if constant motion puts their arms into muscle fatigue.
In my point of veiw, tablets are where technology should go, but you would have to include feature that make it similar to the old keyboard style.
Oh, and PS: If y'all are really listening, then I've been looking for a good slate tablet solution for five years, and haven't got there yet. Samsung and Fujitsu both took my preferred models off the market before I could afford them, and notebooks that have the screen twist around to be a tablet just piss me off.
Have a nice day. :)
TITLE: I am the Candy
PAIRING: House Wilson implied? It's right there, at the beginning.
RATING: PG13 for one swear.
WARNING: Sweetness. Extreme, fluffy, sweetness
SUMMARY: THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS IF: I get a craving for lollipops and I can't have one. :( In other words, I give them to House and Wilson! (and everyone else)
I am House's red lollipop.
I taste like sour red cherry flavor. Without me, House would have to take an extra Vicodin every day. I wouldn't be there to wash away the bitter taste of the coating on House's pills, or have Wilson stare at me in the wet heat of House's mouth.
I am Wilson's Jolly Rancher.
I taste like apples. Wilson likes to suck on me right after a consult, especially if the outlook is good for the patient. Without me, the air wouldn't fill with my stick perfume and House would have to find some other way of finding out the outlook of Wilson's latest cancer kiddie.
I am Chase's Blow-Pop.
Today, I am blueberry flavor. Chase likes me after he and the rest of the team have solved a case, and he likes to savor the gum after all the blueberry is gone knowing that another person has walked out the front door rather than the back.
I am Brenda's organic orange pop.
I taste like shit vitamin C chewables. Brenda got me at the bank because the teller was handling three people at once and confused her with someone who has a kid. Brenda is eating me anyway because House is trapped in exam room one staring at me because he doesn't have a red lollipop yet. He gets one after he's done with the girl in there covered in bee stings.
I am Marco's Juicy Drop Pop.
Marco likes to mix and match me with various kinds of juice, today it's the green juice with the purple pop. He likes me when Debbie from accounting comes to the clinic to talk with Brenda about their finances, so that they can get the clinic's budget in on time. I secretly think he's hoping that she'll notice him, but I also think that it'll never happen.
I am Kutner's Pop Rocks.
Kutner says I don't really taste like anything unless he puts me on a cookie. Honestly, I think that's a weird food combo, but he eats me when he's particularly clever or feeling down. Whatever pops his rock, I guess...
- Mood:
thirsty
This is basically a smattering of the "better" artwork I've done in the past year or so. (I don't draw often enough in my opinion, if this is the best I can come up with)
The types of media I use are:
~pencils
~pens
~pens AND pencils (the diversity!)
~MS Paint (not so much recently as my dad accidentally deleted that off my computer and I have to learn how to use the most uncooperative software ever :GIMP)
And so we commence!
This is a manip of the Google Earth Startup screen, telling us EXACTLY who runs the show here.
This is House's business card, which I made in response to a fic by (I think) euclase (I have a very high chance of being wrong here). Before my dad screwed MSPaint over for me, I was going to copy and shrink a bunch of these and stick them to a pic of wilson's door so it looks like House was using them like darts. Needless to say, MSPaint has been failed. Anyone else wants to do that, GO AHEAD!!! PLEASE!!!
Another fun little manip. I couldn't resist :).
last manip, I promise. Next we get to see my "stellar" art skills with pencils.
Starting off with some cute little chibis I found in an old mouldering sketchbook of a year ago. And I stuck it in my scanner.
Some heads that are not from an old moudering sketchbook, but the faces are kind of wrong. IDK, maybe I made them too thick.
For those of you who do not have TiVos, you can only pause live TV for a certain amount of time before it just moves on. I paused House when Wilson looked like that ^^^ and had art supplies nearby. This is what I completed in that little race against time.
This is practically the first ever picture of Wilson I ever drew, I kind of messed up his hair, but I think the rest is okay. Ish.
This is an idea for a comic I had a while back. Not sure if anything will ever come of it. The premise was that House was slowly turning into a panther...?
I dunno. It doesn't even look good on paper.
This is the picture that spawned my Pixie!Wilson fic and icon.
This is a random thing I had on my desk, but I was laughing to hard to draw House properly. But I don't do chibi House very well anyway, I need to work on that.
And now for the infamous Algebra Notes:
This DDX board features the quadtratic equation, which I was suppossed to memorize, and the fellow's reactions to a game and a lollipop that Wilson stuck to it.
Little scene from Wilson's office, and more candy.
Yet more lollipops. Excellent use of class time, yeah?
Here's another Pixie!Wilson.
I always wondered why there was never a House/Halo crossover.
Admit it! That is sexy.
And that's basically it. Have a nice day.
| Disorder | Rating |
| Paranoid: | High |
| Schizoid: | High |
| Schizotypal: | High |
| Antisocial: | High |
| Borderline: | Low |
| Histrionic: | Moderate |
| Narcissistic: | High |
| Avoidant: | Moderate |
| Dependent: | Low |
| Obsessive-Compulsive: | High |
-- Personality Disorder Test -- -- Personality Disorder Information -- | |
src="http://www.bbspot.com/Images/News_F
border="0" alt="You are Windows 95. You look better than your older brother, but your communication skills are still lacking. You start well, but often zone out.">
Which OS are You?
You answered "yes" to 42 of 100 questions, making you 58.0% nerd pure; that is, you are 58.0% pure in the nerd domain (you have 42.0% nerd in you).
Your Weirdness Factor (AKA Uniqueness Factor) is 26%, based on a comparison of your test results with 576688 other submissions for this test.
The average purity for this test is 73.8%.
The first submission for this test was received June 16, 1994.
The titlebar told me to pick the one I felt I identified with most, but nobody said I couldn't have both. Diversity is fun!
- Mood:
amused
So I did this quiz thing. It was fairly interesting. I used to want to be a Gryffindor back when I was a little dweeb in Kindergarten, but I grew up and realized that I probably identified more with Ravenclaw. This test merely comfirms my suspicions. :)
Which Hogwarts house will you be sorted into?
- Mood:
bored
Name: Will the Homo Simians raise their hands please? Chapter Two
Fandom: . House, MD
Pairing: House/Wilson, Chase/Cameron, Foreman/Fangirling Nurses (He knows he loves it)
Summary: Wilson, House, and the fellows get a big surprise from all corners of the animal kingdom!
Disclaimers: The feature presentation is crack!fic. As in, but not limited to: involuntary species change (don't worry! it's funny, not sad.), magic spells being used, and umm, well I can’t think of a third thing right now. But its all good.. It is also probably supposed to be rated R for themes and language.
Spoilers: Minor one for the season one episode “Poison”, I doubt anyone will find it, though. (Internet cookies for the person who DOES catch it though)
"How am I supposed to get over the wall like this?" Chase asked, putting his paws on the top of aforementioned wall and peering over quite comically as rustling sounds came from Wilson's office. He hoped Wilson was alright, House seemed to have gone from 'pissed off' to 'on speed' in like two seconds flat. Albeit being turned into various animals might be a rather disconcerting experience, but that was a pretty impressive mood swing House pulled off.
Foreman hopped up onto a nearby lawn chair and onto the edge of the wall. His roly-poly frame bounced a little on impact, and his grabby little paws made fun little pad noises as he regained his balance. Foreman had absolutely no jumping skills. But it was interesting to watch, anyway. Chase lumbered over to the chair, and began hauling his little wombutt up onto it. He'd just about managed the whole way up when Cameron finally made it out the door and started squawking.
"Guys? How do birds fly?" she asked, spreading an impressive crimson wingspan and flapping it with no effect. Foreman stared. Chase fell off the chair.
"Bollucks, Cameron, couldn't you have waited until after I'd gotten on the chair? Owww...."
"But I cant't fly, and my feet don't walk very well anymore." Cameron looked sad.
Foreman groaned.
"So? You're not supposed to flap straight up and down, real birds twist their wings a bit and they flap... much... faster?" Foreman watched as first Cameron twisted her wings back as far as they would go. Snapping them forward in a powerful downstroke, she flew up about half a foot before landing on her beak.
"Well, now you know as much about flying as I do." Foreman said, when suddenly there came a shout from behind them.
"Hey guys! I found a bushbaby who thinks he’s an oncologist.” House shouted, easily finding little chinks between bricks with his little fingers and climbing at speeds high enough to require evasive maneuvers on the part of Foreman if he wished to not be run over by PowerHouse Lemur.
"House, how the hell did all this hap- AUGH! RACCOON!" a brown furry lemur had climbed much more slowly up the wall and had puffed out all its fur at the sight of Foreman, and was now backing away while showing off some impressive while tiny primate teeth.
Chase put his paws on the wall again, coming nose-to-tail with Wilson. He quickly put his paws down and moved to a different peer-over-the-wall spot and coming up again, this time next to House. Chase silently debated whether or not that was a wise idea when Wilson saw him.
"Dr. Wilson? Is that you?" Cameron asked from behind the wall. Wilson didn't answer at first, Foreman was busy looking affronted at Wilson, House was busy sitting in between Foreman and Wilson, and Chase was laying low. Cameron flap-hopped up Chase's back.
"Hey, watch it with the sharp feet!" Chase whined. Cameron ignored him and landed on the wall, cocking her head to regard Wilson. Wilson took another step back, and House shoved her off the wall.
"You're scaring Wilson, you morons," he shouted. Cameron birdglowered at him from the pea gravel floor.
"Foreman, stay away from Wilson. He doesn't like raccoons." Chase whispered up to the angry little ball of fur. It relaxed infinitesimally, then uncurled and jumped to the floor to help set Cameron upright. She was having getting off her back troubles.
House surveyed his side of the balcony, then turned to Wilson, who was still radiating Galago tension off his lithe prosimian form.
"Wilson, calm down. Forman is not a real raccoon." House admonished.
He pushed Wilson over, distracting him. It worked, because Wilson took a swipe at him and caught him on the ear. House learned that he was ticklish there, and Wilson learned that he could run much faster now. House ran as fast as he could to get away, but Wilson was laughing and tackling him on the corner of the wall. The fellows were still trying to figure out how to teach Cameron to fly.
Wilson had House pinned upside down to the lawn chair when something picked him up. Chase stared down at the ring-tailed prize in his hands.
"Huh, I guess I can pick them up. Thanks, Foreman." Chase commented with some air of satisfaction in his voice. Chase carefully hobbled over to Cameron, unsteady because wombats do not usually walk on their hind feet alone.
"Hey! I was playing with that!" Wilson shouted, in a tone of voice that expressed a childish anger at having their toy taken from them and the much more familiar emotion of disbelief at the things coming out of his mouth. Did these new bodies come with new instincts also?
"Chase, put me DOWN." House gasped, attempting to squirm out of the wombat's surprisingly powerful grip. Chase didn't.
"You know all the useless stuff. Explain the mechanics of avian flight." Chase directed, clearly enjoying being the biggest one there. House froze, staring at Cameron. Then he laughed.
"You don't know how to fly?" he managed to say between fits of laughter, "But you're a bird!" He kept on laughing until Chase, fed up with having his precarious balance thrown off by House gave the lemur's soft middle a squeeze.
"Wahh! Can't...Breathe!" House shuddered, and stopped laughing. Wilson huffed and jumped on Chase's head, sending the three of them careening into Foreman, who fell on Cameron. Cameron's feathers got ruffled.
"No shaking House." Wilson declared, primly hopping off the top of the animal pile as House sat up, angling for escape from the evil fellows. They got their chance, because Foreman had to help Cameron set her feathers straight and Chase had to start his chair climbing process All. Over. Again.
- Mood:
pleased
I made the title card, and will be writing a script thing later.
http://docs.google.com/Presentation?id=d
That is where the monstrosity is located. Comment if you cant access it. I'll work on making an actual image for the final cut but that will be amusing enough, ne?
So I have always known that I experience sleep on an interactive basis as a series of recurring dreams which may or may not prove to be prophetic and provide me with plenty of ideas to write about, but whether or not I type it out and post it, finish, or make any sense is optional.
Which in my opinion is fairly unfortunate.
But I kind of want to write about my latest dream.
In it, me and my friends have gone to like a House convention or premier or something. I have dressed up like Wilson, seeing as if I try moderately hard, I can make myself physically resemble him without much effort. I don't really sound like him. But I can pull off acting like him. I am much better at acting like House, but alas my eyes are hazel, not blue, and my hair is much too long and dark.
Plus I have no facial hair. And I'm barely tall enough to pull off Wilson, much less House.
There are two versions of this dream that I actually like. there are about five other versions besides that, but I do not like them very much.
The first, and less liked of the two, follows:
I was running, trying to get away from my exgirlfriend, who is actually kind of nice in real life is also kind of mean when you piss her off.
I had majorly pissed her off,
And now she was hunting me, chasing me down to maul me and eat my flesh in a satanic ritual that would slowly rot my soul and burn whatever's left.
So of course I was just like :RUNNING TIME: and there I was racing down some bland concrete hallway with my tie flapping in the slipstream I made from running so fast, and I was trying to run quietly so she wouldn't be able to find me but I was wearing my (relatively) new Pumas which are not nearly as well broken in as I'd like them to be even after having them for almost eight months.
So I have the sound of my echoing footsteps competing with the rush of air in my ears, and my racing pulse pushing blood past my eardrums at a fantastical rate and decibel level; I'm breathing really hard and I must have gone down this hallway for about a quarter mile, where is she and I need a bloody place to hide because I've been running for about an hour and my lungs and muscles hurt and I'm about to freakin collapse.
I found a door. It was just plain brown door, with a tarnished doorknob, but I dashed inside just as the harpy was screaming down the hallway for her fresh meat.
And inside, ROBERT LEONARD IS SITTING ON A BUCKET.
He's like "NO! I REFUSE TO BE NEAR FANGIRLS." And he was about to leave and I was like No he will give away my position!
So I told him, "I'm not a fangirl. I am a bisexual cross dresser who is running away from my ex girfriend, and thought this was a good place to hide. Please don't go outside, you'll give away our position, she IS a fangirl and we look alike so she might think you're me and then you'd be in trouble."
"You're bisexual?" because that is always the only part people pay attention to. Even amazing actors who I have never met.
"Transexual in a few years, bi for now." And now I'm peeking out the cracks in the hinges so I can see the banshee run past shrieking bloody murder.
"Your voice is higher and you have blue in your hair. You look nothing like me."
"We are in a pitch dark closet. You are relying on a two second glimpse of my to base your decision on,"
"I don't usually wear ties out in public."
Touche. But I have one better.
"I'm not dressed like you, I'm dressed like your character. He wears ties out places."
So then he got kind of quiet. There was like a blue glow, and he was playing with his cell phone, some flash game or whatnot while I was rummaging through my crappy school issue knapsack for food.
Random, yes?
I don't know what happens after that in this version. Which I like better, but everyone I tell likes this next version better.
Me and my friends are outside the building at the same House convention or premier or whatever, when -guess who- races past us to hide behind a wall. Several screaming fangirls are right behind him but stop when they see us. In this version, I actually am a guy and for some reason sound reasonably like him (you'd be able to tell us apart in a heartbeat if we were standing in the same room , but apart it would be harder.)
Even so, my voice is still ever so slightly higher. But it is disguisable, so I on purposely make the huge "I see them, so they must see me" mistake that so many people who are being chased make. I manage to lead them far enough away that I can easily nip up a tree and dial my buddy Xaj, who was trying to help Mr. Leonard out of a barrel.
(Her Chase costume looked rather amusing, and I mention this because she was trying extra hard not to get her lab coat dirty. I had been smart and went with Wilson's unbelievably sexy green suit from I think season one, but it may have been two.)
So anyway, she answers, and she's like
"Yeah I got him out of the barrel OMG CAN YOU BELIEVE IT I ACTUALLY GOT TO T
I was feeling kind of irritated that this was the moment that she had chosen to freak out about celebrities because I had just saved him from being swarmed by hundreds of giant chested fangirls.
Ever read "Defensive Strategies"? Think "velocibreasts".
However, I didn't speak to him and I had run away so as Xaj pointed out, I really didn't have any room to talk.
Literally, as fangirls were beginning to climb to tree and they might have heard me and figured out that I was an impostor cupcake if Hugh Laurie hadn't wandered by, and figured that I needed saving.
All I had time to do was put on an earpiece, stick the mic sensitivity way up and say "put your end on speaker, I need lines" before HUGH WAS IN EARSHOT AND THOUGHT I WAS TH
All I could think was, Wow, Brilliant actor, wonderfully funny, incredibly witty, but what a schizno, He should be able to spot a fake muffin.
So then the motherboard crackles to life and Mr. Leonard was telling me what to say to Mr. Laurie. It was amusing.
I manage to subtly lead him over to where Mr. Leonard is hidden, and my Ex shows up (she is nice in this version, and Xaj has told her to create a distraction so that Mr. Laurie turns his head.
Apparently, also, for saving him from the fangirls, Mr. Leonard has offered to grant us one wish each (me and Xaj)
So I tell him my wish as I trade places with him while Mr. Laurie isn't looking, and Xaj has already told him.
Being charitable, Xaj has asked him to french-kiss Mr. Laurie as soon as he stops staring at the strange girl singing/signing Chinese Opera.
Being smart, I told him I wanted him to push a H/W storyline, so that we'd get to see him do that several times.
So that's where my brain left off with that one, with Two Hawt Men Kissing On The Sidewalk.
I think I could use some direction with those.
On another note, I once read a fic where Cuddy bet House and Wilson that they wouldn't be able to stand a week handcuffed to each other.
The author hadn't finished it last I had read it, but It got me thinking that I wanted to write a similar one.
It's just, they would wear collars chained to each other's necks.
And I could do so much with the whole collared to each other thing. ;)
The two cats that I strongly suspect are in a homosexual incestous relationship. Hee. I've been searching for proof of this for a while now, so I stay quiet and don't move so they didn't register I was there. They were behind me, so I didn't see, but I'm pretty sure I heard them having sex.
lol.
In case anyone is really that curious, their names are Spooky and Tweedledee.
Spooky is all black. He is the uncle of Tweedledee, who is stripey and brown. They hang together.
And I would totally give them fish as a congratulatory present if they would just come out with it already, (or even let me watch </perv>)
Like, a lot of fish. Fresh fish, as in alive less than an hour ago fish.
*sigh*
At least I know I was be paranoid and projecting. That's a plus.
- Mood: amused
I like the word "bupkes"
Never was a sound such as that wasted on nothing.
TITLE: Peeps
PAIRING: Wilson and House are sitting in a tree K I S S I N G
I DO NOT OWN HOUSE OR PEEPS, BECAUSE NO ONE LIKES TO GIVE ME THINGS AND I HAVE NO MONEY.
WARNING: PEEPS. AND CRACK. AND I DON”T KNOW, I FEEL SICK AND WHEN I’M SICK I WANT TO BE AS Annoying as possible. No Mary Sues, though, just really bad writing.
SUMMARY: THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS IF: I get sick (my head get stuffed up and I lose my sense of balance and self control) I see a box of peeps while watching House, and then of course there is the fact that I write nothing that could possibly ever happen in the show EVER
Title: Help Wilson Win the Sexy Poll!
Author: </a>![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
</a>aiatalay</span></b></span>
Pairings: House/Wilson
Rating: PG-13
Words: I didn't bother to count.
Beta:I had my cat look over it. I think that the screaming meows mean that it's ok.
Summary: THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS IF: The Nurses hold a sexy poll. Madness ensues.…
A/N: This is a prompt that no one came up with and was inspired by the TV Guide’s Sexy Poll, which you should all go vote for James Wilson in, because otherwise he might lose and I might have to kill you.
Title: GUMMI BEARz!
Author: </a></b></a>aiatalay
Pairings: House/Wilson friendship
Rating: G. No, wait, I think there's some swears. Ummm, PG 13
Words: I didn't bother to count. I was laughing too hard. You won't care, you'll be laughing too hard.
Beta:I had my cat look over it. I think that the screaming meows mean that it's ok.
Summary: THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS IF YOU EAT MANY GUMMIBEARZ, AND PUT THE GUMMIBAR SONG ON
A/N: Make sure that people who would be mad at you for laughing are away. I got an earful from my brother while writing this because i was like giggling the whole time.
Name: WARNING: MAGIC IS REAL
Fandom: House, M.D.
Pairing: House/Wilson
Summary: House tries out a new prank. Didn't expect it to work. Not only did it work, it worked well.
Disclaimers: The feature presentation is crack!fic. As in, but not limited to: involuntary species change (don't worry! it's funny, not sad.), magic spells being used, and the existence of nymphs. It is also probably supposed to be rated R for themes and language.
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Name: Will the Homo Simians raise their hands please?
Fandom: . House, MD
Pairing: House/Wilson, Chase/Cameron, Foreman/Fangirling Nurses (He knows he loves it)
Summary: Wilson, House, and the fellows get a big surprise from all corners of the animal kingdom!
Disclaimers: The feature presentation is crack!fic. As in, but not limited to: involuntary species change (don't worry! it's funny, not sad.), magic spells being used, and umm, well I can’t think of a third thing right now. But its all good.. It is also probably supposed to be rated R for themes and language.
Spoilers: Minor one for the season one episode “Poison”, I doubt anyone will find it, though. (Internet cookies for the person who DOES catch it though)
Chapter Two
TITLE: I am the Candy
PAIRING: House Wilson implied? It's right there, at the beginning.
RATING: PG13 for one swear.
WARNING: Sweetness. Extreme, fluffy, sweetness
SUMMARY: THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS IF: I get a craving for lollipops and I can't have one. :( In other words, I give them to House and Wilson! (and everyone else)
TITLE: Chargin Mah Lazaar!!
PAIRING: Gen (House Wilson Friends FOREVER)
RATING: PG
WARNING: You may want to take a look at the popular internet meme "Shoop Da Woop" before reading this.
SUMMARY: This is what happens when I throw virtual darts at my to do list and say "Write something... Right NOW!". *Thack*
TITLE: Flicker
PAIRING: Gen
RATING: G
WARNING: None
SUMMARY: Riley and his thought process
It’s a verb. In some cases it is a noun. Derivatives include to flick, flicker, flickering, and synonyms include flash, and fling.
Flick.
A movement, and the eyes follow in a sudden jerk. It’s a reflexive response, and it’s saved lives.
Flick.
In transitive etymological sense, it probably came from the sound of such sudden movements.
Flick.
This kind of sudden connection, it links ideas together. It’s how people learn, weaving all the knowledge together in one great rug.
Flick.
Thinking about something, it has to do with food. Someone is sick. It’s a gastrointestinal disease. Gastro-intestinal. Having or relating to the digestive system or more specifically all the parts of it below the esophagus. Food comes and goes here, the food probably brought the sickness.
Flick.
Who is sick? Have they eaten anything suspicious lately? Disease. Antonym of ease, or wellness. Used to be hyphenated, used to be dis-ease. Not at ease, not well. Now it’s synonymous with “ill health”. Makes someone sick to see a pretty word mangled like that.
Flick.
A noise. Flick is a noise. Onomatopoeia.
Flick.
How much time has gone by? Less than four seconds. Many more to go, too much time to fill, not enough time to.
Flick.
To what? Is it important that knowledge is obtained from the sick one?
Flick.
Yes. The sick one will show how to make other sick ones better. The sick one has a new remedy, the sick one is testing a cure.
Flick.
Flick is also a feeling. Someone taps on a shoulder, someone gets an idea in their fool head.
Flick.
Flick is a connection, flick feels like neurons connecting together, string in a scarf.
Flick.
The sick one is not sick. Oxymoron, that sentence is an oxymoron.
Flick.
Ohx-ee-more-ahwn. Ox is the sound of all, Auxiliary jack. All standard jack. EE, the linking sound, used to cause two sounds to combine to make a new meaning. More, a word to add, contradictory in the face of all. Ahwn, noun. The word translates the idea of contradiction into a noun, which should be an adjective but it is used as a noun. That is an oxymoron. Ic has to be added to modify it into an adjective. Oxymoronic.
Flick.
New idea, sick one gone. Just passing through. Pass through the doors, the sick one’s healer is inside.
Flick.
Healer looks up. Movement. Follow. React. Greet.
Flick.
Come over, shrink back. Its scent is unfamiliar.
Flick.
A touch. New smell waft away, smells like home. Its touch is always familiar, no matter who stamps the healer with their unworthy smell.
Flick.
Healer smile, more sudden movement. No danger.
PAIRING: Wilson and House are sitting in a tree K I S S I N G
I DO NOT OWN HOUSE OR PEEPS, BECAUSE NO ONE LIKES TO GIVE ME THINGS AND I HAVE NO MONEY.
WARNING: PEEPS. AND CRACK. AND I DON”T KNOW, I FEEL SICK AND WHEN I’M SICK I WANT TO BE AS Annoying as possible. No Mary Sues, though, just really bad writing.
SUMMARY: THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS IF: I get sick (my head get stuffed up and I lose my sense of balance and self control) I see a box of peeps while watching House, and then of course there is the fact that I write nothing that could possibly ever happen in the show EVER.
I LIKE PEEPS.
AND HOUSE.
SO JUST DEAL WITH IT.
Wilson looked at the box on his desk. Easter wasn’t very far away, and his religious patients were giving him candy and whatnot left and right. But this had mysteriously appeared on his desk. There was no To: From: sticker or anything like a card or whatever, so that virtually guaranteed that House had put it there.
He very carefully opened the box. Inside was a standard package of Marshmallow Peeps, in all their yellow bunny glory. It was open, and one was missing. That did not bode well, but Wilson does not know that yet because he does not see the evile Great Bunny Peep sneaking up behind him.
Evile Great Bunny Peep waves his great Peep Wand and Turns Wilson Into a Peep. Wilson notices this because all of a sudden he is yellow and sugary, and bunny shaped.
And only three feet tall. Evile Great Bunny Peep laughs Eviley and hides in the package of Peeps, for he is eviley Amused.
Wilson hopps around his office looking desperately for a way to Not Be a Peep anymore.
Except the only sounds he can make are various inflections of the word PEEP so yelling does not help.
All he can do is hide under his desk and wait for House to come save him. House obliges, two hours later, to find Wilson almost crying chocolate tears all over his soft marmallowy self. Aww, that is so sad. Peeps should not be sad, I decided, so I paid a visit to House’s head.
House, this is the author speaking. Wilson is sad and trapped in his office. I want you to go help him.
House is confused. He does not have schizophrenia, and even if he did it has not spoke to him for a while. Not since it lost its notebooks in the great Cornfield Fic Raid.
What are you waiting for? Go, now!
So, since House was bored anyway, he went. And now he is dumbstruck, because Wilson has been turned into a Large Yellow Bunny Peep. At least, he is somewhat sure it is Wilson, because Wilson is not here and this Large Yellow Bunny Peep has a Chocolate Tie.
Oh, dear, I must be sicker than I thought to have come up with that nonsense.
House is quite sure he has gone off his rocker. But he gently drags the Large Yellow Bunny Peep out from beneath the desk anyways, and it wobbles over to him the rest of the way and gives what can only be described as the Peep Hug.
Evile Great Bunny Peep is now displeased. The Peep Hug is only a step away from the Peep Kiss and that is what will take the curse off of Wilson! He comes out of the package again, but House sees him.
Get the Evile Great Bunny Peep! He is the cause of this mess! I shout in House’s head. House tells me to shut up, and throws a paperweight at me.
This angers me, so I make Evile Great Bunny Peep turn House into a Pink Chicky Peep. This is the gayest of all the peeps.
Now House is Not Happy. Wilson is caught between being Peep/Depressed and Peep\amused, and Evile Great Bunny Peep is just amused.
But House has an Idea now. He takes his cane, which is difficult because House is now Pink and a Marshmallow, and Hits Evile Great Bunny Peep with it.
Evile Great Bunny Peep dies, and Wilson gives him another Peep Hug. House very pointedly does not admit that Peep Hugs are very nice.
But Wilson is still sad because he is still a Large Yellow Bunny Peep, and House decides that He Is The Only One Allowed To Be Miserable. He gives Wilson a Peep Hug and Wilson stops Peep Crying over being a Large Yellow Bunny Peep.
House has decided now that he does not want to continue Peep Hugging because that Sounds Very Gay. Wilson, however, has decided that he rather likes Peep Hugging so when House tries to pull away, he grabs onto House’s squishy Pinkness to prevent him from doing that.
He also topples over somewhat, and Falls on House into a Peep Kiss. House is actually able to fall over backward now, because he Is No Longer A Peep. Wilson Is No Longer A Peep as well, but that doesn’t stop him from continuing to fall on House. House still tastes like sugar, anyway.
House is now laying on his back on the floor, and there is a pretty oncologist straddling him. Wilson also tastes like sugar. Marshmallow sugar to be exact, and there is still a dusting of yellow sugar in Wilson’s hair and on Wilson’s skin.
It tastes good, so House licks some off of Wilson’s cheek, stubble and sugar making raspy sounds against Wilson’s smooth jaw.
Wilson likes this better than being a Large Yellow Bunny Peep. He likes this a lot, and House is all Pink Sugary. Peep Kisses are sticky, thinks Wilson, as the dissolved sugar on his face dries and feels adhesive-ish. Wilson doesn’t care though. He’s just had the weirdest dream ever, he was turned into a fucking Large Yellow Bunny Peep for Pete’s Sake, and now he has House under him, all covered in pink sugar and very tasty looking.
So when Wilson wakes up on his couch to discover that, One) he is now hard and Two) It really was all a dream and Three) he has to work now, he is kind of disappointed. But, what the heck, his office walls are not clear like House’s and his door locks. So he can take care of the hard-on fairly easily. He notices the Peep Present from his dream on the desk. He can get someone who is not him to test open it, maybe Cuddy will help him. Or a bomb squad. Either, way, he is not touching that, and he has other things to touch anyway, specifically his dick.
Wilson usually tries to consciously fantasize about any of the pretty female nurses, odd dreams aside. He has been finding this more and more difficult as time goes on, and he suspects that his thoughts turning from Pediatrics Kelly to Cardiology Sean on an increasingly frequent basis might have had something to do with his last two marriages failing. Oh well. Pediatrics Kelly is taken, Pathology Devin got her. And Cardiology Sean, while incredibly hot looking, has nothing on certain people who look good in pink sugar.
House has been crawling around Wilson’s dreams and fantasies for a good long time now. And ad Wilson remembers the less odd parts of his dream, the grainy little sweet bits of sticky dyed glucose on them, he comes. House had tasted very sweet in his dream.
Wilson has an interesting idea now; he will go tell House about the dream, editing out the more homosexual parts unless House seems receptive to them.
So Wilson goes to the Diagnostics Conference room after cleaning himself up, and finds House.
“I had the creepiest dream.” He starts, but in House’s chair, is Evile Great Bunny Peep! He is not dead! And, there is a Large Blue Bunny Peep chained to the desk. It looks miserable.
“Oh no! It wasn’t a dream!” Wilson shouts, and then he uses House’s cane to stab Evile Great Bunny Peep Repeatedly. After he is now satisfied that Evile Great Bunny Peep is really dead, Wilson unchains the Large Blue Bunny Peep. Lifting it up, Wilson finds that House is very light and squishy now. House wiggles a little, Peeping indignantly. He does not want Wilson’s …. Whatever it is. House just wants to suffer alone!
But Wilson will have none of that. He initiates the Peep Kiss, which is very sugary. And blue. Wilson probably has blue sugar all over his tie and shirt now.
But now human House is in Wilson’s arms. Warm. Solid. Not at all squishy like the marshmallow. Pulling back slightly, Wilson notices the blue sugar in on House’s face is the same color as his eyes.
“How did you know to do that?” asked House, whose hands were still resting comfortably on Wilson’s upper arms, while Wilson’s hands were on House’s back and left hip.
“Do what?” replied Wilson, who had also noticed their position and was wondering how long he could get away with keeping it that way.
“You Peep-Kissed me,” pointed out House.
“That is how we solved the problem of being Peeps in my dream, I decided to give it a try,” Wilson said. House even had blue sugar on his eyelashes, which was mildly distracting.
“You had a dream about us being Peeps?”
“Yeah, I was coming in here to tell you about it because it was so stupid but then you were a Peep so I tried it.”
Wilson wondered for a moment if House’s sudden stillness means that he does not want to be standing-cuddling anymore. House will have to tell him if Wilson has to take his hands off House though, he is memorizing what it feels like to hold House.
“I had a weird dream about peeps too. We had Peep Sex.” Well, that was completely unexpected. Now let’s actually watch the dream House had, just for fun and because I want all of you to think about this every time you try to eat Peeps in the future.
I’m letting Wilson watch too.
In House’s dream, everyone in PPTH has been turned into Human Sized Peeps. Cuddy is a pink bunny, and Wilson is a yellow bunny again (with another Chocolate Tie). House is a blue bunny. Wilson thinks it’s cute.
Foreman is a blue chicky, Cameron is a pink chicky, and Chase is a yellow chicky, by the way, but you only see them as House passes by them in the Diagnostics conference room. He leaves Cuddy in his office. Wilson is in the hallway, and he and the Chickies are wearing lab coats as well. Wilson is amused by the sight of a large yellow bunny shaped marshmallow wearing a lab coat for some reason. It’s probably because he’s all giddy on endorphins from holding onto House and watching a crazy Peep Dream.
Anyways, it is time for Peep House and Peep Wilson to go home. So Wilson puts his lab coat in his office, and they go downstairs to get on Peep House’s Sugarcycle. Which is powered by microwave marshmallow energy.
Peep House and Peep Wilson go inside Peep House's apartment. This is where Peep House squishes Peep Wilson against the wall and they Begin to Make Out Squishily. It is squshy and sugary. And also squishy. After they Magically Spawn Peep Genitals, they then start running their Magically Spawned Peep Arms/Hands over each other and then they give each other handjobs.
Because they are Peeps Bunnies, this means that they get to have SUPER
They took the frosting and smeared it all over each other, and now they look like Chocolate Snowmen.
But then they clean themselves up, and that is where House's dream ends.
Chicago tribune article about sex toys for senior citizens
Anything that involves House aquiring mini rave lights (pm if you don't know what those are)
spartan costumes (from HALO not 300)
kinky? probably.... Wilson is tired of crayon so he gets his cancer kiddies body pencils instead because more washable. House finds out... and takes a few....
Wilson somehow gets a hairball
blood
magnetic anal prostate stimulation (perhaps this is one of those things that I think up when someone gives me caffiene?)
dream based audio stimulation- ex. Wilson was doing his paperwork and was working late so he put music on so he wouldn't fall asleep. He does fall asleep anyway, and his harry potter audiobooks come on and he dreams about harry potter. Extra points if House finds out and tries to mess with Wison's dreams.
THUMBSUCKING. No one actually did anything with this when my friend posted it on hw_reqs.... I was sad
Cameron uses her copy of The Sims 2 to control PPTH- or more specifically the people in it.
Mini vibrators have been sewn into either House or Wilson's shirt and they don'tt know.... yet.....
Videogame steals House and WIlson into computer, and they have to play and beat it to get out. (this one I want to write but other people can draw for it) Extra points if its a game i know of or like- Morrowind( computer version, plus expansion packs if you really want to torture yorself and H/W), The Sims 2 (ultimate unbeatable games, lol) Halo (xbox), Roller Coaster Tycoon*, Lilo & Stich (Trouble in paradise CD ROM)* Disney Arcade Frenzy* Rock Band (xbox 360), Fuzion Frenzy (xbox or xbox 360), Basically any RPG- a Role Playing Game or some game with a plot, even if the player creates said plot (Sims)
games with an * are kids games and would probably not be found in House's vidgeogame library
that is all I want to type for now. My fingers are getting tired.
First Great Archaeological Find- ChapterThree of WARNING: MAGIC IS REAL
I shall link to that and post it when I finish retyping. :)
BUT GUESS WHAT?
I woke up today at my normal 6:10 (no alarm clock, minimal caffiene. I can hear the jealousy mobs outside my door now...) and go OH HAI world, then I go make breakfast (I've run out of bagels WAHHH) and then I remembered that I don't actually have to do anything today.
So then I logged onto LJ, only to find that all of the House Wilson stories on my FList are creepy disturbing ones. Like DoS.
(No offense to DoS, but I check my closet for you at night.)
Just once I'd like to wake up to fluff like the old days! WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
- Mood:
aggravated
Kind of a shame because supergrunt shall take over the world someday or something. IDK, I just like him :)
